Woman Punches Man Who Told Her To Cheer Up

A Grimsby woman has been given an official police warning after punching a man who told her, "Cheer up, love, it may never happen!"

A penitent Norah Longshanks, 36, said she was trudging home in the pouring rain, a heavy bag of shopping in either hand when she met the man on the pavement.

"I might not have reacted so badly if I hadn't just met my neighbour who told me, 'Turn that frown upside down,'" she said.

She was already in a bad mood before she set out to do her shopping, after her husband had forgotten to take the dog for a walk and he had shit in the house.

"The dog, that is, not my husband," she clarified.

Then in the supermarket she met an acquaintance. "She is always so chipper it drives you mad. She subjected me to a long spiel about living each day as if it's your last.

"If I thought it was going to be my last day  I'd stay in bed with a bottle of whiskey, ordering takeaways and watching TV. It's patently obvious you couldn't do that every day without going bankrupt, ballooning to the size of a house and becoming an alcoholic."

As they parted the woman called back, "What doesn't kill you makes you stronger."

"'Really?' I called after her. 'What about a persistent vegetative state?' but she had  disappeared into the frozen food aisle and didn't hear me."

Norah said she was sorry that everything boiled over and she punched the man, who was not badly hurt.

"But it was the straw that broke the camel's back," she said.

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